Book Review: Kidfree & Lovin’ It!

Kaye Walters has written a very comprehensive book about all things “kidfree”.  Kidfree & Lovin’ It! reads almost like a manual but it is never dry.  This book is organized into 3 main categories which include: Why we are kidfree; Issues we face; and The good stuff.  For people who are active in the TCFL forum much of the first two sections will be very familiar.  Even with the familiarity of the subject matter I still found myself very engaged with the quotes, anecdotes, graphs, charts and author commentary.  This book definitely reads like a labor of love and the hard work that went into writing this book is evident.

Ms. Walters  set out to write this book because she was not finding answers to many of the questions she had. This inspired her to ask the questions and to seek out the information about choosing a life as a non parent.

Kaye created both The Kidfree Survey and The Childfree Dating Survey to which she received nearly 4,500 responses combined. I can see why writing this book took nearly 6 years to complete given the amount of data that needed to be read organized and written about.

This book includes current research and topics that are relevant to what many members here at The Childfree Life are talking about.  Ms. Walters has organized the book into 25 chapters and has also added a resource list. The all popular Bingo card is also included along with a blank one for members to fill in their own information. If you are not familiar with “Bingo” cards as it relates to the childfree community this book explains it well.

Another section I particularly enjoyed reading was found in Chapter 25.  You Are Not Alone, Prominent People who Passed on Procreating includes many familiar names of celebrities, artists, musicians, writers and others.  It is inspiring and a bit comforting to read about well known men and women who have made the childfree choice and their contributions to the culture.  Ms. Walters provides a list of names and what each person is known for but does not include detail about the individuals.  Perhaps this will inspire further discussion as the childfree choice is discussed more openly.  It would be interesting to learn more about some of these individuals and what impact living a life sans children had on their careers and creative lives.

I recommend this book to those that are decidedly kidfree and to those who are on the fence. This book would also be a good one to give the parents who are having difficulty understanding the choice.

This book was a joy to read. It is the book that I wish I had 15 years ago when I was making my own decision.  The book is currently available on Amazon.  It will be available for the Kindle in January.

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7 Responses to Book Review: Kidfree & Lovin’ It!

  1. Kidfree & Lovin’ It! by Kaye D. Walters, Serena Bay Publishing, 2012. I should have known. This is yet another book glorifying the childfree life. It is extremely well done, full of solid information and great resources, including an extensive list of famous non-parents and lists of places for the childfree to find other childfree people. Walters spent years surveying thousands of childfree people and includes lots of quotes from people who don’t have children, nearly all by choice.

  2. This book includes current research and topics that are relevant to what many members here at The Childfree Life are talking about. Ms. Walters has organized the book into 25 chapters and has also added a resource list. The all popular Bingo card is also included along with a blank one for members to fill in their own information. If you are not familiar with “Bingo” cards as it relates to the childfree community this book explains it well.

  3. This is a fantastic book about the choice to become “kidfree”, I couldn’t put it down. Kaye Walters conducted a survey of thousands of childfree people. The book goes through the results of this survey question-by-question covering everything from why people made the choice to fears about choosing to be childfree. It includes lots of perspectives including those who have always known they would never be parents, those who are undecided, and those who wanted to be parents but circumstance has made them childfree.I’ve read several books on being childfree and this is my favorite so far. I think she really hit on some points that I’ve not seen in other childfree books, like that some people might get twinges of wanting to have kids or even feel their “biological clock” tick, but that doesn’t mean you should/have to become a parent.It is a quick and easy read and I really like the way she organized the information.

  4. This issue is at the heart of my Childless by Marriage blog and book. It’s an issue that most books about childlessness ( see my resource list ) pay minimal attention to. But it’s a big one. If my first husband had been willing and ready to have children, I’d be a grandmother now. If my second had been willing to add more children to the three he already had and if he had not had a vasectomy, I’d have grown children and maybe grandchildren now. If I had dumped either one because I wanted to have children and they didn’t, my life would have been completely different.

  5. Stacy Booth says:

    I learned that my single, childfree status is not as unique as I thought…and I am so grateful for that. This book validated all the reasons I have for not being a mother.

  6. by Heather Wardell (1999). Stories of how the formerly infertile have created happy childfree lives.

  7. Shawna Mejia says:

    by Kaye D. Walters, Serena Bay Publishing, 2012. This is yet another book glorifying the childfree life. It is extremely well done, full of solid information and great resources, including an extensive list of famous non-parents and lists of places for the childfree to find other childfree people. Walters spent years surveying thousands of childfree people and includes lots of quotes from people who don’t have children, nearly all by choice. This is the most thorough book that I have seen on the subject. But I had a hard time reading it. The overarching message seems to be that only fools procreate. It’s too expensive, messes up your careers and your relationships, and, most important, you have to sacrifice your freedom. Certainly Walters offers a few words here and there noting that if you feel that parenting is right for you, then go for it. But those passages are overwhelmed by pages and pages of why parenting sucks and why children are undesirable. Also, if you and your mate disagree, then compromise is impossible; you have to break up. If you are childless by choice, you will love this book. If you’re on the fence, you may decide after reading this that you don’t want children after all. But if you want children or wanted them and couldn’t have them, I bet you won’t make it through the whole book.

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